I woke up this morning with the early light of dawn. Awake at 5:00 a.m. and out of bed before 5:30, on a Saturday. I have never been one to sleep-in. Early morning has always been my very favourite time of day, especially on days like this, when my Little Miss is sleeping soundly (The Phantom in the Other Room has recently been visiting but seems to be packing his bags for a hasty departure), and my husband, who just last night returned from another week away on business, still rests peacefully in our bed with Mikey-the-cat nestled at his side. With coffee in hand, a good book beside me, a little time to write and my family near-by, life is good. The serenity of this morning is perfect, and even the grey outside my window feels comforting, like an old wool blanket wrapped around my mood to keep it warm and content. Until my morning reverie is torn to shreds by this headline: Gossip Guy Chace Crawford Busted for Pot (http://ca.eonline.com/uberblog/detail.jsp?contentId=184326).
No, I am not a close personal friend of Chace Crawford’s. I am not even a fan. It is drugs that bother me, pure and simple.
Recently I read an article by Katie Allison Granju about her struggle to admit to her son’s drug addiction. You can read the article in its entirety at http://babble.com/CS/blogs/homework/archive/2010/05/01/a-parenting-secret-i-am-no-longer-willing-to-keep.aspx. Her story thrashed my heart into a pulp. I felt her pain in every word and I have been thinking about it, and wanting to write about it, ever since. Drug addiction is one of my greatest fears. Full disclosure time: I am biased. I do not do drugs, have never done drugs, will never do drugs. Of any kind. Period. My family, too, has been affected by drug addiction, and this is a road I will not go down.
With straight-forward, no-holds-barred honesty, Katie lays it on the table: “My beloved, firstborn child suffers from a terrible disease, addiction, and he has been struggling with it for several years. It started with early juvenile experimentation with marijuana at about age 14 and has progressed to where he is now, addicted to hard street drugs and as a result, lying in a critical care hospital bed, dealing with a horrific brain trauma along with various other physical injuries that are the direct result of that disease.”
Poor Chace was arrested for possession of marijuana. The police found on his person one joint. One. The consensus on Twitter, which is a new addiction of mine far less destructive than one to any chemical substance, is that one joint just means it’s time to buy more. Did I miss something? I know that many people—who am I kidding? most people—are far more accepting of drugs and in particular pot-smoking than I am, but just when did society start to condone en masse law-breaking behaviours that are dangerous to our youth?
This attitude scares me. I have a daughter, 12 years-old and off to high school in the fall, and drug use will be all around her. How do I keep her safe? My stomach flops at the thought. Intuitively, I maintain a zero tolerance policy, but is that enough?
We live on the West Coast, in a city proud of its hippy-esque, pot-infused past. I have friends, very good friends whom I consider to be very good parents, who plan to grow pot for their children the same age as my Little Miss. Their rationale: The kids are gonna smoke it anyway, we might as well know what they’re getting. My daughter, God-willing, will not be par-taking.
Katie writes: “My first and biggest mistake – and one that I implore other parents reading this not to make themselves – was to minimize and rationalize my child’s earliest drug use as the kind of “experimentation” that “lots of kids” try when they are adolescents. In fact, however, this “experimentation” was an early warning signal, a huge, blaring, shrieking, flashing early warning sign, and I chose not to see or hear it for what it really was. It was akin to early stage pediatric cancer and instead, I treated it like he had made a “D” on his report card or something similarly inconsequential.”
Early, accepted drug use drug use is a problem. It was a problem for my relative and it was a problem for poor Katie’s son who, sadly, did not make it (http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2010/jun/05/sheriff-weapon-not-used/). It is not to be condoned, encouraged or excused. Call me old-fashioned, call me unrealistic, call me naive, call me square, but there will be no drugs in my daughter’s life (nor mine), if I have anything to say about it. Even one joint is one too many.
•••
Are you as bothered by drugs as I am ? Do you think I’m unrealistic? Let me know what you’re thinking, and post a comment!
Saturday, June 5th, 2010, 8:25 am | 
Things I Know and Things I Don't | 
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September 2, 2011 at 12:33 am
October 18, 2011 at 1:40 pm
September 1, 2011 at 7:58 pm
October 18, 2011 at 1:41 pm
September 1, 2011 at 6:50 pm
August 25, 2011 at 11:43 pm
For crying out loud cheese burgers cause more harm than cannabis.
I understand someone who does not want their kids to smoke weed, because it can be detrimental to a young brain, same reason why kids should not drink. But the fact of the matter is, cannabis helps more than it hurts. The opposite is true for the failed “war on drugs” paid for by yours truly, tobacco and alcohol, the real gateway drugs.
One joint isnt too much, One joint is not enough.
October 18, 2011 at 6:51 pm
Seriously though, your point of view is noted and is shared by many, I am simply not among them. The issues of drug legalization and the comparative effects of alcohol and tobacco are just too big to tackle in this reply; maybe they are the subject of another essay or two down the road. But for clarification, my post was not about the ideological merits or lack thereof of the legalization of one drug over another, or which one is most harmful. It was, however, about the negative effects of cannabis, effects that I have personally witnessed, and the loss of a young life that resulted from going down a path that started by smoking pot. It is sad and unnecessary, illegal or not. Thanks for the comment.
March 16, 2011 at 1:27 am
June 9, 2010 at 4:32 pm
June 9, 2010 at 6:17 pm
Christie
June 6, 2010 at 6:28 pm
Yes. One joint is too many. Involve yourself. Get into the uncomfortable discussions and keep at it. Keep reminding your child of their own worth. Keep prodding them about the fragile aspects of life and the potential for each to reach for the stars.
Say what you want – but my son truly is lost to us. He has a four year old son – it is scary, terrifying. There is nothing we can do. It is so very, very sad.
June 6, 2010 at 7:51 pm
Thank you so very, very much for sharing your story with me. I am teary-eyed as I write this. As I mentioned, we, too, have dealt with the ravages of addiction, and for a long time a very close relative was lost to me and my family as well. I know how that feels. He has a son I have only seen once, 14 years ago. My family member is one of the lucky ones – he is better now, which is a blessing I cannot describe. But there was so much wasted time, so much sadness and worry, and so much pain. My heart goes out to you and your children. It is so hard to keep our children close and safe and happy. I wish everyone understood what’s at stake.
Christie
June 5, 2010 at 10:49 am
June 5, 2010 at 11:54 am
Christie
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June 15, 2010 at 8:03 pm
June 6, 2010 at 4:16 pm